meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Randomize
