I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
