There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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