Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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