You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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