You're so nebulous sometimes
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
