addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Randomize
