I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize