My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
