fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
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No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
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I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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