great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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