I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
