So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize