Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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