They have a pepper shaker for pot.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
