great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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