He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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