she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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