I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
