Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize