I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I am available for nakedness
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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