please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He called his prostate his "boner button".
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
