my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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