My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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