Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
