you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize
