smell my finger.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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