it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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