Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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