I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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