so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I accidentally had phone sex last night
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
