we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Houston, we have a blender
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I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
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I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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