i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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