More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Your tits are I can't wait for
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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