That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
