We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
