Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
