WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
