Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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