For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Randomize
