Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.

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  (203): walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers. http://tfl.nu/bvxk
  Replies (21) Good night (4290) Bad night (487)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.

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  (425): It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back. http://tfl.nu/2rvp
  Replies (24) Good night (7115) Bad night (704)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.

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  (843): if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume. http://tfl.nu/blds
  Replies (47) Good night (3690) Bad night (701)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside

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  (501): there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside http://tfl.nu/1bna
  Replies (85) Good night (7051) Bad night (815)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.

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  (845): I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard. http://tfl.nu/kj6h
  Replies (31) Good night (6691) Bad night (1161)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.

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  (615): He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick. http://tfl.nu/ib3l
  Replies (23) Good night (1129) Bad night (7812)
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  (949): View more from California

  Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.

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  (949): Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN. http://tfl.nu/2o4b
  Replies (34) Good night (14427) Bad night (1336)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.

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  (816): Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs. http://tfl.nu/rxnt
  Replies (18) Good night (4452) Bad night (940)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.

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  (314): Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me. http://tfl.nu/z9vp
  Replies (6) Good night (3056) Bad night (1219)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor

  (1-802): View more from Vermont

  oh but she would

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  (802): she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor (1-802): oh but she would http://tfl.nu/kme5
  Replies (3) Good night (1205) Bad night (650)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.

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  (405): It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion. http://tfl.nu/3wue
  Replies (2) Good night (874) Bad night (500)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.

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  (724): No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology. http://tfl.nu/e8xh
  Replies (8) Good night (3793) Bad night (620)
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  (315): View more from New York

  There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.

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  (315): There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate. http://tfl.nu/2ksi
  Replies (7) Good night (1541) Bad night (346)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.

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  (843): I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning. http://tfl.nu/842q
  Replies (4) Good night (778) Bad night (253)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.

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  (360): A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy. http://tfl.nu/2450
  Replies (4) Good night (1315) Bad night (325)

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