i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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