i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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