He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
