fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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