New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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