I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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