You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Bring me that man meat
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
