break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
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Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
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I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
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