the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
