We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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